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Euphoric Field is my personal fansite dedicated to the anime series Ef: A Tale of Memories and Ef: A Tale of Melodies. Euphoric Field is a non-profit experimental fansite that aims to promote the Ef anime titles.
TITLE: low morale
DATE: Tuesday, June 20, 2017
0
I know it's a temporary feeling, but my morale is low due to the incessant need of looking for a job, confusion of priorities, and the nag that tells me to be the best now. The time to figuring out is finished, and I have to embrace the truth that it's time to make those plans into motion. I'm frustrated, because I don't know how to find the job I'm looking for. The ads are the best place to start, but I can't find anything. And there's also a thought at the back of my mind that tells me to wait for an opening in the university, where I'm working right now. It's confusing. I see myself lagging behind once more as I missed the summer convocation and that I'm graduating this fall instead. I wait and wait some more, but in my other aspect of my life I'm also falling behind. My self-esteem and confidence are low. I absolutely hate it when I have to listen to other people point out to me that I'm falling behind, because it's obvious that I know. I'm just keeping quiet. I'm not giving up though, and I'm confident that everything will sort itself out. Just like how everything had been sorted back in university.

God, I just don't like this dry and aimless feeling, and that when I start to do something, it turns into crap. I also hate it that when I do something that feels important (for me), other people take it for granted despite working hard to finish it while bearing a low morale. What else can I do?

Yuu Himura
You can't rush art and you can't rush science.

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DATE:
6/20/2017
TITLE: worry not, fear not
DATE: Monday, June 5, 2017
0
If there's something that I need to fix about myself it would have to be worrying. I can't work properly when I'm worried about something. It doesn't do me any good, and it only disrupts my mood. People still worry though and I find it fascinating why it's a habit that we do despite that it doesn't help us with anything. Worry is a paralysis.

Why am I worried? I don't have a stable job, and I'm graduating. Money's tough right now and I'm about to pay for my student loan, so I don't know where I'm going to get the money from. I'm also learning how to drive and I'm not confident yet to even practice driving out in the streets. And I'm also having a bit of a difficulty with our church with the new arrangements in place regarding the music ministry. It might be one of those stuff typical for someone else. In the end, I couldn't cherish the present moment or concentrate on the task at hand properly. I'm trying to stay focused at my current work, but I'm not exerting my full effort.

Worrying is stupid and I need to learn how to stop doing it from now on. Please. The problem is imaginary.

Hiro Hirono
Worry, worry, worry by the Three Suns

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DATE:
6/05/2017
TITLE: my simple wish
DATE: Saturday, May 20, 2017
0
I do have a simple wish in life-- it's that one day the mangakas or the authors of the anime titles that I've chosen for my fansites could send me an email or a letter saying, "What a silly thing you've done." and that I hopefully had made them smile if they stumbled upon this Internet space. Not to mention receive something that's autograph too. I would be the happiest kid!

Hiro Hirono
Lame. Cheesy. Boo.
Yuu Himura
Highly unrealistic.
Chihiro Shindou
I think it's cute.
Kimikim Kimster
Chihiro-sama!
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DATE:
5/20/2017
TITLE: onward bound
DATE: Friday, April 14, 2017
0
I've finished my message for the Good Friday service. I started preparing for it this past Monday, but I couldn't get away from the fact that I had to write back-to-back exams on Tuesday. I'm very grateful that I've finished the most difficult courses for my degree. I thought I was going to fail and I've started thinking of other plans in order to salvage of what I have started in order to graduate at the earliest. But I found GOD in my courses. I found Him in university.

After finishing my first exam, it was 4pm and I sought solace below the mezzanine in UofW. I placed my earphones and opened my laptop to try getting reading further the materials for Good Friday. I couldn't help but have my eyes well up, because of realizing GOD's goodness and faithfulness in my life. There were a few students reading on other tables, and it was truly difficult not to be teary eyed. I hid my face, so that I wouldn't cause a scene. I guess I was really excited to finish this term-- after 6-7 years of education, I've finally finished. All that time of working in order to fund my life, and all this studying, it's finally finishing. I knew that once I finish writing my second exam, the most difficult in my degree, graduation is mine.

May I remind myself that GOD is good in my life. Browse through your Facebook photos, and you will find out. GOD brought me up to where I am now, He will not leave you hanging to fend for yourself. The time to step is fast approaching. Time to really get to work and reach for those dreams in life.

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DATE:
4/14/2017
TITLE: meh
DATE: Sunday, March 19, 2017
0
Just dropping in to write how I feel right now - the past week has been like crap. I only made it to my classes once, my total work hours was meager, and then I caught the cold on Friday. I'm still feeling the effects of my cold, but I feel much better. I couldn't even sleep properly in the weekend. I'm glad I was able to deliver the message for the Bible Study this morning. My throat hurt afterward. I just realized this, but there's only two weeks left before the Final exam period. After the finals week, what's going to happen to my life?

Hiro Hirono
Are you going to be a bum?

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DATE:
3/19/2017

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~ef Tale of Memories:
Episode 1: eve
Episode 2: upon a time
Episode 3: paradox
Episode 4: honesty
Episode 5: outline
Episode 6: rain
Episode 7: I...
Episode 8: clear colour
Episode 9: forget me not
Episode 10: I'm here
Episode 11: ever forever
Episode 12: love / dream
~ef Tale of Melodies:
Episode 1: ever
Episode 2: read
Episode 3: union
Episode 4: turn
Episode 5: utter
Episode 6: flection
Episode 7: reflection
Episode 8: reutter
Episode 9: return
Episode 10: reunion
Episode 11: reread
Episode 12: forever / ef